ZABECCA MAKES ME FEEL A BIT QUESY

Now, I am not one to judge people, but to me Zayn Malik and Rebecca Ferguson just look plain wrong.

It's not because of age- there is only six years difference, which is nothing really. It's just the fact that Zayn still looks like a little boy, where is Rebecca is a full-grown woman with her own children.

I mean, it is all good for the women of the world to swoon over the Biebs, but you wouldn't want to actually date him right?!!

I just think it might be a tad confusing for her children to see her smooching someone that looks like he could be their brother.

Maybe Rebecca needs to start realising that she's a woman and not a little girl anymore.

NUBO SUBO

So it's been two years since Susan Boyle a.k.a. SuBo hit our screens with her THOSE eyebrows and THAT mustard dress...

And until now, she has remained fairly un-transformed (apart from a very necessary eyebrow pluck and a new dress).

But it seems the 50-year-old (yes fifty) has decided to take a leaf out of her mentor Simon Cowell's books and is getting her teeth whitened.

Apparently the ecentric Scottish singer thinks the 'Subo sparkle treatment' will take years off her, and overhaul her image.

Insiders said she had even considered veneers but doesn't want to look 'weird'.

But is it a good thing that Subo is beautifying herself? Does she need the makeover or is she just going too Hollywood on us and loosing her original charm?

Let me know your thoughts...

ALL YOU NEED FOR A RIGHT ROYAL KNEES-UP

So, everyone is hyped for the big day tomorrow...

What will Kate wear? Will Harry be pissed? Will Andrew say something embarassing...

But we all know the BIGGEST thing about the Royal Wedding is the massive party that us 'commonfolk' are going to have!

So I thought I'd bring you the best royal merchandise around so you can celebrate the nuptials in good old British style and make your party a right royal affair.

Check them out and get down the shops before they go!

Why not get the party
started with some truely
regal tunes?
£4.99 HMV

How about getting some
facepaints so all your
guests can look as sexy
as this guy?
£4.99 Asda

Getting bored of the actual
service? Well stick this
on for a laugh
£10.93 Asda

There's no better way to
celebrate the royal wedding
than to drink out of Wills and Kates
faces... and then chuck them
in the bin.
£1 Aldi

Why not make some British-based
cupcakes because otherwise
people might not guess
there is a wedding
£9 John Lewis

KATE'S LOST TOO MUCH WEIGHT

I'm not being funny, I know every bride wants to look their best on their wedding day, but in my opinion, Kate Middleton has lost waaaay to much weight.

In fact she didn't even need to lose any weight in the first place as she's always been slim in every picture I've ever seen of her.

I'm sure her idea was that she thought by losing weight she'd look amazing on her big day, when if fact she's just turned herself into a skinny rake.

To be honest, I thought the future princess, with her first-class education and well-to-do family would be more sensible that to bow down to the pressures of the 'size zero' stereotype and put her health at risk- it's what z-list celebs do, not future queens!

With a million girls looking up to her, I reckon Kate's advisors need to sit her down, show her this picture and tell her honestly that she needs to scoff a plate of afternoon cream teas... pronto!

CORRIE GIRLS HAVE TAKEN THEIR ROLE A BIT FAR

I don't know about you... but to me Brooke Vincent and Sacha Parkinson, who play Corronation Street's first lesbian couple, have taken their roles a bit too seriously with this latest picture of them in a bath together.

I mean, I know they're only carrying on their roles as Sophie Webster and Sian Powers on the photoshoot for lesbian magazine 'Diva', but it is a little perverse some of the poses they are doing- even more steamier than most men's mags!

If they are not careful, people are going to actually think they girls are a couple in real life- what with them already being best mates and admitting to 'holding hands' as they walk down the street.

They also moaned about the fact that guys contantly ask them to kiss when they are out together- but when they're doing shoots like this, of course men will behave that way to them.

I think their behaviour is a little attention-seeking if I'm honest, and don't really think they have any grounds for their complaints.

Fair enough, they are on 19 and of course they like the fact that guys fancy them, but you can't moan about it when you are basically seeking it out in the first place.

In a couple of years when they've grown up a bit, I can't help but think they will be a little embarassed by all these over-the-top photoshoots and interviews- when they will probably claim that they are now 'serious actresses' and will moan that the show has stereotyped them.

we will just have to wait and see...

DEMI NEEDS TO GROW UP

Looking at this picture, you would find it hard to tell who is the older sister...

But in fact, it is 48-year-old mother Demi Moore sitting next to her SIXTEEN-year-old daughter Tallula!

I know, WTF!

The fact is, Tallula is dressed far more appropriately for a sit-down event in her high-necked blouse and long skirt, whereas Mum Demi is sat there in a reveal-all body-con dress that you're more likely to see on 18-year-olds just about to go out clubbing on a Friday night.

It just seems silly that Demi doesn't want to grow up. I mean, fair enough she's had £220,000 to keep her face looking young, and I'm not saying that's good, but a lot of celebrities do obviously because they don't want wrinkles, but what's all this dressing like a teen with the hair and clothes.

If I was her daughter, I would feel like it was always a competition to see who could look the best, and it would be so much pressure.

The fact is, Mums are supposed to grow up and focus on their children a bit more, but it seems like Demi is just a bit self-obsessed.

I mean, imagine if you saw a 50-year-old man dressed like a teen boy- people would think it's weird right?

Obviously she's got a hot young boyf in Ashton Kutcher, and she wants to look good for him, but there is a line... and I think she's not far from crossing it.

BORE OFF JORDAN

Is anyone else reaaaaaallly bored of hearing about Jordan right about now?

I mean, I know I'm going against my own point by writing about her now, but I just want one little rant and then I shall speak of her no more!

The thing is, why do people actually care? Haven't they realised yet that she is just a fame-hungry monster who would probably sell her soul to get a front page.

The thing is, she doesn't really have a life- she just creates one that she thinks will get her the most attention.

I mean, you could tell that when she got together with Alex it wasn't love- she just needed some yuppy foolish enough to marry her so she could get a kick out of Pete seeing her with another guy.

Then she had a few months when the press weren't interested and it was like 'oh look we're getting married.'

Then next came 'we're having a baby' which obviously would have produced mega-money magazine deals. But when poor Alex couldn't give her a little sprog, she threw him in the gutter without a care in the world.

Now she's trying to make out that it is HIM who is hurting her by 'selling out her family' and 'demanding £2m'.

How can he hurt her? She's a soulless machine who just tramples on anyone for a quick buck. She's quite clearly trying to manipulate the situation in her favour as of usual.

Alex is said to have depression- which I think is understandable after spending all that time with that idiot. Man he deserves that £2m!

I wish the papers would just see what she's doing though and just ignore her- the public don't care what she's upto anymore, she's just turned into a faceless, money-grabbling bimbo who hurts anyone and everyone around her.

Maybe she should try being nice to people for once in her life and people might then have something good to say about her.