Nicole's Bordering On Desperate With New Single 'Wet'

Oh Nicole, such a pretty girl but you really are being desperate aren't you.

After the release of saucy single 'Right There', Miss Scherzinger is back with yet another beautifully-entitled single... 'Wet'.

Yes, the ex-Pussycat Doll has seemingly decided to go down the route of 'sex sells' with her solo career- spouting a loud of sexual inuendo's that would may your granny blush as she 'shakes her thang' in her latest skimpy outfit.

For a thirty-year-old woman I really don't know how she takes herself seriously. I mean, imagine standing in a press conference in front of a bunch of respectable journalists in hotpants going 'Oh yeah so my next single is gonna be called Wet'. I think I would rather die.

The fact is, she's beautiful and has a good voice- so why not use it properly and get someone to write her a good tune, or better still, write one herself that actually means something, instead of spewing out this generic rubbish and getting it out for the lads.

It's like how they say men who are really good loking aren't good in bed as they've never had to try.

She and her management need to realise that all she's doing is alienating her female fan-base and making herself look like a bit of a desperate prat as she churns out crap songs while being half-naked.

Why not take a leaf out of Adele's book- a woman who writes and sings music from the heart whilst still being fully-clothed.

That's why her album's been at the top of the chart for 18 weeks and Nicole's single will probably be in the basement bin in one.

[If you want to torture yourself with Nicole's latest offering, it's below...]

Aaron Shows His Immaturity At Trying To Be Mature

Now I'm all for letting people make their own decisions, and of course you can't help who you fall in love with, but Aaron Johnson and Sam Taylor-Wood's relationship just baffles me.

Being the same age as Aaron, 21, I can't understand why you would want to settle down and have children with someone who is double your age.

Fair enough I may not be at the time in my life where I want kids so may be biased, but I can't really see how anyone who is 21 is seriously ready to have children.

Aaron may think he's old and wise enough to bear that responsibility, but that fact that he does think that, shows his immaturity right there and how much growing up he still has to do.

The fact that he probably thinks of himself as a 'thespian' may have something to do with it- yes he's read lots of books, so he knows all about life right? Wrong.

You can read all the books you like, but you never know how to really deal with life until you go out there and live it.

The fact is, I've had a lot of experiences in my life already at my young age (trust me), but I find myself being suprised and still learning stuff about myself and the world around me every single day.

The thing is, I know that there's never usually a perfect time to have kids- hell some forty year-old men aren't mature enough to have them, but the fact that he's bringing children into his life when he is barely out of puberty is a bit worrying.

What is it turns out that he wakes up one morning and decides this isn't the life he wants? Where will that leave his kids.

I mean, people my age (myself including) change our minds like the wind- one minute you are TOTALLY sure of what you want, and then you find yourself doing the complete opposite.

When you bring kids into that equation- there is NO going back.

The fact that he is marrying a 44-year-old woman is something to be considered too. Obviously right now she is still an attractive woman, but in around 10 years she will be going in to the menopause and when he's 31, he may find himself with a wife that he no longer finds attractive.

Now, fair enough, that may be a little 'what if' for ten years time, I mean they might have split up by then, but I'm the sort of person who wants to marry for life, not just for ten years- especially when there's kids involved.

All in all, I may be totally wrong, he may just be the type of guy who's just totally a family man and he may still fancy his wife in ten years when she's starting to go grey and wrinkly. I mean I do hope I am.

But I also hope he's taken all the above into serious consideration because this is real life we're talking about. I just hope he's ready for that.

BRIDESMAIDS: A REVIEW

So I'm sure you've seen and lol'd at the trailer for 'Bridesmaids' already and read all those 4-star reviews, but are thinking to yourself, is it really that funny?

I mean, it's quite a regular occurance these days for the papers go on about how 'amazing' a film is, then when you get there and think 'really?' as all those funny bits in the trailer become the only laugh-out-loud bits the film has to offer.

But... I must say, Bridesmaids is simply genius!

Here is a film that actually (shock horror) allows women to be funny. And I don't mean smirk-type funny, I mean spitting out your popcorn as your sides hurt funny.

Not being a feminist or whatevs, but it was such a refreshing thing to see women in a film have personalities and real characters- not just props there to look good and to seem desperate for a boyfriend, because we all know modern women definitely aren't like that.

Anyway, enough about that, back to the film... If you don't know already, then it's about a group of boistrous women led by the fabulous Kristen Wiig as Annie, 'the maid of dishonour', who have been asked by their friend Lillian (Maya Rudolph) to make up her wedding party.

Annie's life is pretty crazy right now- she's just lost her bakery business, she's sleeping with a 'fit but twit' type cad who just won't commit, and she's suddenly realized she's thirty-odd even though she feels about nineteen. So when her life-long pal Lillian asks her to be her maid of honour, it's not her ideal situation.

Although she loves Lil, her current situation doesn't make her the best candidate, teamed with the fact that Lillian's annoyingly perfect pal Helen (Rose Byrne) does anything she can to sabotage her efforts it's not easy to keep the party in check. Especially when that party is a bunch of sex-mad, life-loving misfits.

The film follows Annie and the girls as they go on their hectic journey to get Lilly down the aisle- with hilarious antics on the way including a dress-fitting scene that you won't wanna be eating your popcorn through and an aeroplane journey that will have you giggling long after the film's finished.

Wiig plays her role perfectly- Annie's honest, down-to-earth character is definitely a worthy rival to Bridget Jones and will have you wishing she was your best friend.

All of the supporting cast play their roles brilliantly too; Rudolph has perfect chemistry with Wiig, Mellissa McCarthy is devilishly funny as the butch Megan and there's even a role for the The IT Crowd's Chris O'Dowd who plays sweet-natured cop Nathan Rhodes.

All-in-all an innovative, funny, laugh-out-loud, honest film that is bringing rom-com's into the modern era at last. Go See!!

ELIZA'S NEW LOOK IS PANTS

Sorry, but when did it become acceptable to wear just a pair of pants when out and about in daylight?

I don't get why celebrities feel like they can walk around in underwear and think it's normal like Eliza Doolittle did here at the Coca Cola Olympics 2012 launch at Westfield shopping centre yesterday.

If any of us girls walked down the highstreet in fuchia frillies everyone would think we are mad, but just because they sing a bit on the radio it's suddenly justified?

Maybe Miss Doolittle thinks she can get away with the look because she is wearing trainers, but I just don't see the point? Surely a pair of shorts would make the outfit look a lot better and everyone would still see the fact that she had amazing legs, without her having her vag nearly on show.

Lets just hope this doesn't become the latest trend down the highstreet. That would NOT be a pretty sight.

KATE'S LOST TOO MUCH WEIGHT

I'm not being funny, I know every bride wants to look their best on their wedding day, but in my opinion, Kate Middleton has lost waaaay to much weight.

In fact she didn't even need to lose any weight in the first place as she's always been slim in every picture I've ever seen of her.

I'm sure her idea was that she thought by losing weight she'd look amazing on her big day, when if fact she's just turned herself into a skinny rake.

To be honest, I thought the future princess, with her first-class education and well-to-do family would be more sensible that to bow down to the pressures of the 'size zero' stereotype and put her health at risk- it's what z-list celebs do, not future queens!

With a million girls looking up to her, I reckon Kate's advisors need to sit her down, show her this picture and tell her honestly that she needs to scoff a plate of afternoon cream teas... pronto!

CORRIE GIRLS HAVE TAKEN THEIR ROLE A BIT FAR

I don't know about you... but to me Brooke Vincent and Sacha Parkinson, who play Corronation Street's first lesbian couple, have taken their roles a bit too seriously with this latest picture of them in a bath together.

I mean, I know they're only carrying on their roles as Sophie Webster and Sian Powers on the photoshoot for lesbian magazine 'Diva', but it is a little perverse some of the poses they are doing- even more steamier than most men's mags!

If they are not careful, people are going to actually think they girls are a couple in real life- what with them already being best mates and admitting to 'holding hands' as they walk down the street.

They also moaned about the fact that guys contantly ask them to kiss when they are out together- but when they're doing shoots like this, of course men will behave that way to them.

I think their behaviour is a little attention-seeking if I'm honest, and don't really think they have any grounds for their complaints.

Fair enough, they are on 19 and of course they like the fact that guys fancy them, but you can't moan about it when you are basically seeking it out in the first place.

In a couple of years when they've grown up a bit, I can't help but think they will be a little embarassed by all these over-the-top photoshoots and interviews- when they will probably claim that they are now 'serious actresses' and will moan that the show has stereotyped them.

we will just have to wait and see...

BORE OFF JORDAN

Is anyone else reaaaaaallly bored of hearing about Jordan right about now?

I mean, I know I'm going against my own point by writing about her now, but I just want one little rant and then I shall speak of her no more!

The thing is, why do people actually care? Haven't they realised yet that she is just a fame-hungry monster who would probably sell her soul to get a front page.

The thing is, she doesn't really have a life- she just creates one that she thinks will get her the most attention.

I mean, you could tell that when she got together with Alex it wasn't love- she just needed some yuppy foolish enough to marry her so she could get a kick out of Pete seeing her with another guy.

Then she had a few months when the press weren't interested and it was like 'oh look we're getting married.'

Then next came 'we're having a baby' which obviously would have produced mega-money magazine deals. But when poor Alex couldn't give her a little sprog, she threw him in the gutter without a care in the world.

Now she's trying to make out that it is HIM who is hurting her by 'selling out her family' and 'demanding £2m'.

How can he hurt her? She's a soulless machine who just tramples on anyone for a quick buck. She's quite clearly trying to manipulate the situation in her favour as of usual.

Alex is said to have depression- which I think is understandable after spending all that time with that idiot. Man he deserves that £2m!

I wish the papers would just see what she's doing though and just ignore her- the public don't care what she's upto anymore, she's just turned into a faceless, money-grabbling bimbo who hurts anyone and everyone around her.

Maybe she should try being nice to people for once in her life and people might then have something good to say about her.